The “urban” (i.e. has a rap bit in it)

Ok so next up are the entries that are, or at least try be at the 'cooler' end of the Eurovision spectrum. Only some succeed, and thankfully, and perhaps unbelievably, the UK entry seems to be one of them!

United Kingdom – "I Can" – Blue

So this year, the BBC have taken the brave decision to send Blue to Europe. You know, like a “real” band. One of my ongoing gripes with those that diss the UK not winning Eurovision is that they don’t realise how other countries genuinely try and send their best where as we dredge up old X-factor losers. So in a sense, I’m pleased, though the trouble with Blue is that they were popular in the late 90s and I’m not certain we’re ready for a revival. The song is damn catchy though, and we know they can sing quite well, so a low score would begrudgingly convince me the voting really is ALL political.

Having seen the lads do a few live performances now, they seem slick and at ease, so we really do have a hope at winning this year. Come on, all together, #“I can, I will...”#

Latvia/Latvija – "Angel in disguise" – Musiqq

[from http://www.eurovision.tv/page/history/year/participant-profile/?song=26113]

Quite a good sounding guitar “buddy-ballad” until you pay attention to the lyrics – “love me with luscious thighs”, which make this a bit less innocent and earnest than I imagine it was planned to be. It’s catchy though and very listenable, though the rap in the middle is just naff.
http://www.bbc.co.uk/eurovision/songs/2011/latvia.shtml

Georgia/საქართველო – "One More Day" - Eldrine

This starts off with some electronica, has a rocky chorus, throws in a rap and a weird video that’s like a behind-the-scene mixed in with the actual filming. Like it though, and hope the megaphones make it to the stage.

Greece/Ελλάδα – "Watch My Dance" – Loucas Yiorkas feat. Stereo Mike

This rap heavy song is pretty brave given that few across Europe will understand the lyrics. The singing bits are okay, and the laika music that is mandatory for all Greek/Cypriot entries twiddles on in the background, but this song never feels like it gets going.
http://www.bbc.co.uk/eurovision/songs/2011/greece.shtml

The Gay

OMG. These four songs are the highlights of the year. They are my Eurovision lifeblood, camp disco schlager music that just make me smile and then dance inanely. Even when they're actually shit. Joyous times.

Sweden/Sverige – "Popular" – Eric Saade

This sounds like a lot of Swedeish schlager-pop and good on it. Eric belts out some crackingly bad lines; the early rhyming of “impossible” with erm, “possible” is a big humdinger of a bleurgh, but he makes up for it with a series of Bieber-licioius mini-dance breaks. In truth, this is utterly ridiculous, but pretend that you’re a thirteen-year old girl in your bedroom and you’ll love it (so obviously I do)

Hungary/Magyarország – "What About My Dreams?" – Kati Wolf

Think “Hungarian Sarah Jessica Parker” and Kati is it. This starts as a power ballad that you hope becomes a “traditional” Eurovision stomper... and it does, though it momentary blip in the middle with far too much warbling, though this is redeemed at the end when Kylie’s “Disco Needs You” choir climbs on board. If you’ve had enough to drink and/or are in a club, this is the kind of song that will have jumping around pretending you’re in a spotlight with rain pouring on your face.

Malta – One Life – Glen Vella

If Glen isn’t gay then my ‘dar is way off and someone needs to tell him to smile less, stop flailing around and wear less neon. The music and lyrics are pure diva anthem, this is “fabulous”, but it ain’t a grower. (In case I’m not clear, it’s awful. Like, really B.A.D.)

Israel/יִשְׂרָאֵל‎‎/إِسْرَائِيل– "Ding Dong" – Dana International

S/he’s back! Ex-winner Dana belts out this gay club-friendly choon with the campest title this year. She also manages to sing in Hebrew without it sounding like a respiratory disease ward in winter, no small achievement. Having said that, it does a sound a bit Eurovision of 10 years ago, but that doesn’t stop it being fabulous.

The Europop

My favourite category, the out and out pop songs. There's some gems among the duds!

Ireland/Eire – "Lipstick" – Jedward

 They have landed. It’s Jedward. The song itself is not so bad, but anyone who saw the X-Factor knows what to expect when it comes to the live performance. You either love them (Ireland apparently) or hate them. It’s undeniably catchy “dum de dum da dadum”– I guess it depends how annoying they’ll come across on stage in Germany. This might be difficult given John's recent injury...

Croatia/Hrvatska – "Celebrate" - Daria

Daria remains somewhat dead in the eyes throughout the video, and the whole affair feels rather lacklustre, and definitely not worthy of “celebration”. This song does, however, contains the amazing rhyme of “moment” and “comet”.
http://www.bbc.co.uk/eurovision/songs/2011/croatia.shtml

Romania/România – "Change" – Hotel FM

This really wants to be a feel-good anthem but does end up feeling a bit like something from children’s TV, a bit in the S Club 7 vein. You probably will end up clapping along to it and it’s very likeable, but you know a song has got lost when it repeats the chorus a hundred times before the end.
http://www.bbc.co.uk/eurovision/songs/2011/romania.shtml

Spain/España – "Que me quiten lo bailao" - Lucia Perez

Wow. This is proper Spanish. In that it’s really cheap sounding (and the video looking) but frustratingly catchy. The title translates as “Nobody can take the good times away from me”, and she hammers that point home so much I think she’s probably in denial. Never mind, now you’ve heard it, you’ll be humming it over and over again. I can’t wait for the English language version “I’m over the moon”.

Poland/Polska – "Jestem" – Magdalena Tul

Magdalena sings “I am” and it’s a catchy (probably more so if you understand Polish) pop song that fills 3 minutes is a pleasant way, but is a bit like a Rachel Stevens album track and not spectacular.
http://www.bbc.co.uk/eurovision/songs/2011/poland.shtml

Norway – Haba Haba – Stella Mwangi

Haba haba is really likeable and danceable. Stella’s ‘fro is a delight, and I love her accent as she says “When as a little girl my gran’ma told me...”. Not quite sure how Norway ends up sending a calypso to Eurovision, but it’s a nice change and I look forward to playing this in the summer months!

Armenia/Հայաստան – "Boom Boom" – Emmy

This starts off quite feel good and you think it’s gonna be okay, even with that title, but then the chorus hits with its awful production, awful lyrics and the moment is lost. It never has a chance to pick up again before another “chaka chaka, laka laka” hits. Shame as she appears to be a good singer.
http://www.bbc.co.uk/eurovision/songs/2011/armenia.shtml

Russia/Россия – "Get You" – Alexej Vorobjov

“I’m running, I’m coming for you” says the slick-haired Alexej, which would probably send a fair few women running themselves. The back-beat is really irritating, but the song itself is pretty catchy and I can see my living room having a few people shout along with it during the Final, especially during the “whoa-oh” bits.

The ballads (duets)

Ah the Eurovision duet. A rare beast. It's hard not to be cheesy, but there have been some really good ones (2010's "Playing with Fire", 2008's "Day after Day") mixed in with the disasters (anyone remember Malta's "On Again...Off Again" in 2004?!).
The last duo to win were the Olsen Brothers from Denmark in 2000, and so with the recent trend of solo women winning, maybe it's time for a pair to win again?

Azerbaijan/Azərbaycan – "Running Scared" - Ell & Nikki

This duet is moving, catchy and one of the more (UK) chart worthy entries this year, which continues Azerbaijan’s impressive line-up of songs in their Eurovision infancy. The song is crying out for a wind machine based performance. If the chemistry between the two on stage holds up, this might place well, though prob lacks that something to actually win.

Slovakia/Slovensko - "I’m Still Alive" – TWiiNS

The video for this is bizarre, with clips of Slovakia’s football and ice hockey “victories”, footage of the revolution and then clips of people dispersed from their homes by the Danube flooding, topped off by the birth of a baby. Is this song making out to be an anthem for Slovakia? Or surviving against the odds? Would you believe that it's produced by the someone who lists Timbaland, Nelly Furtado & Justin Timberlake as their clientele? It’s just plain nuts, confirmed by lyrics such as “When your road’s not too wide, then trust the heart never lies”.

The ballads (girls)

Next up in this years seemingly ballad-heavy Eurovision review are the girls. Girls with big lungs traditionally do well in Eurovision, remember this is the contest that "gave the world Celine Dion. There have been several high-scoring lady-ballads in recent years, most notably Serbia's Marija Šerifović winner in 2007...(a little more danced-up for the repeat performance)


Can 2011's ladies hit the right notes (ahem)...?

 

 

Switzerland/Schweiz/Suisse/Svizzera – "In Love For a While" – Anna Rossinelli

This has a really cute plinky-plinky start, and the feel-good factor continues throughout. “I love everything about you” may not be 100% true about this song, but it’s near enough. There's an irrepressable urge to "La la la" along with her after the choruses. Beware the video has some dodgy stomping "dancing", which is not gonna attract her smiley violin/bass playing boyfriends.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PtlhYGVtZlk

 

 

Bulgaria/България – "Na inat" ("In spite") – Poli Genova

The Bulgarian P!nk with an angry ballad (though it looks like mum is on the keyboards) that is okay really. Depending on what is either side of it in the running order might make all the difference, because there’s nothing else really like it, and its all fairly well accomplished, though it doesn’t really leave you wanting more.
The video has power stations, police banging their riot shields and a dove trying to fly around in a cage (of course it gets released in the end). 
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TwH2VU7Vqss

 

 

Ukraine/Україна –"Angel" – Mika Newton

I think I like this just for the Ukrainian accent saying “I lurve yooo” and the rhyme “we are angels, we’re in danger”. All in all, one of the better ballads, though some of the high notes leave a lot of room for disaster in the live show.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Jtfetx1u8I0

 

 

San Marino – "Stand By"- Senit

Okay, I’ll admit, the smaller the country, the more likely I am to fall in love, but this is a really beautiful song that makes me melt. Senit has got the “smize” down to a tee and her voice is just lovely. The accompanying video veers between godawful tourist promo and blissful black and white. The more I think about it, I just love this song actually! You just kind of have to forget that this is a country with a population smaller than Altrincham, Stretford or Fareham.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Owh0pnNzh0Y

 

 

Lithuania/Lietuva - "C’est ma vie" – Evelina Sašenko

Full of bad lyrics, a plodding tune that is (admittedly) adequately sung by Evelina, this is very forgettable. That’s all.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BWsuBnfYQBw

The ballads (boys)

So first up are the ballads, and there's a shedload, so we'll start with the boys. 

Just as a note, the last solo male ballad to win was Russia's Dima Bilan in 2008, with the lovely "Believe". You might also remember him as the slightly too-skinny one with a mullet that pulled a ballerina out of a piano, in 2006. Dima was Russia's biggest pop star, (and still is), so had that going for him vote wise. Will any of 2011's boy ballads match up to his standard...?

 

 

Denmark/Danmark – "A New Tomorrow" – A Friend in London

“Come on boys, come on girls” this choon begins, encouraging you to wave your hands in the air. The lyrics are pretty good and the guitars churn out a memorable rhythm in the background, which make this, all in all, a good entry that would make for a charming, end-of-the-night pub singalong.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aGVZktHLZhk

 

 

Italy/Italia – "Madness of Love" – Raphael Gualazzi

This piano jazz mixes Italian and English, is charming and bit Michael Bublé (in a good way). “Someone hit me and I fell into your heart, my dear” is a lovely syrupy line in the middle, followed by a full on trumpet section. Not really one to sing a long too, but lovely for a summer drive.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tO0Ih3q4PSE 

 

 

Netherlands/Nederland – "Never Alone" - 3JS

What is it with Holland and manbands for Eurovision? This guitar ballad is a bit earnest and laden so heavy with clichés that it begins to drag at the 2 minute mark. The final line which comes straight from Amsterdam’s red light district, “at the sweet end of your trail”, is brilliant though.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KlneiG2bGuE

 

 

 

France – "Sognu" – Amaury Vassili

France’s entry is the classy operatic-but-not-annoying-with-it “Sognu”. Who knows what it’s about but in the video he wanders about a lot carrying a handbag and does a lot of meaningful staring. It’s apparently the early bookie’s favourite to win. It's sung in Corsican. We’ll see.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uEb7hRo-Qyk

So 4 down, 39 to go. Bear with me, I promise it gets better.

Eurovision 2011

Okay, so it’s time for my traditional rundown of this year’s Eurovision entries. 

The Grand Final of Eurovision 2011 is due to be staged in Düsseldorf, Germany on the 14^th of May, and there are a whopping 43 entrants this year, with the return of San Marino, Austria, Hungary and Italy (who return after a 14 year gap).

As the biggest funders of the contest, the UK, France, Spain, Italy and Germany automatically qualify for the Final, leaving twenty places for the remaining 38 countries, who’ll be decided from two semi-finals in the preceding week. One of my biggest sadnesses about Eurovision is that some gems, both musical and comedy, are often confined to these semi-finals, so do take a look.

I’ve gone with my gut and reviewed these songs after just one listen to try and get an idea of how they’ll stand up on the actual night.

In the past I’ve gone for the chronological or alphabetical approach; this time I’ve decided to group the songs of a similar style together, and I’ll blog each “category” together. Hopefully, I’ll finish not feeling too shell-shocked, and we’ll round off with a blog about which songs I came back to listen to.

The BBC site is great if you find yourself getting sucked into Eurovision world, and if you totally fall in, ESC Today has all the latest news, as well as unintentionally hilarious interviews conducted in awkward English.